irkin my last nerve

it never stops. it's constantly there and it just keeps going and going and going. it's that constant irritant that just irks my last nerve. i pray to God that it will just stop and go away forever but for some reason it won't. it seems like i've tried everything just to make it stop but it's only temporary. i should be ok with the fact that this is the way it is but i'm not. i'm angry and stressed, which just makes it worse. i'm confused and inadequate. i'm sad and happy at the same time. my emotions are all messed up. i've got to chill. jesus, chill me out. you seem to be the only method that lasts longer than a few hours. you are my satisfaction and praise you for that!